today went to party world. actually planned to go shopping with the girls. but i really dont feel like gg out with helen cos of the things i saw in her blog. she is atill such a bitch. i maybe too guo fen to say tt but i really do think so. n today she said zx called her ask her r we still gg out. hmm maybe its becos she seems to be the one organising the whole thing. but i asked shiyi sms her last nite she din reply. duno la. then yv smsed her say she gg back indo we got anyth need to buy. like y her? did she became miss popular over nite? without me noticing she had caught everyone's attention again? or am i really tt straightfwd n hurt everyone unti lthey hates me?
these few days i knew many things tt made me tot of all the above. first of all. i found her blog. i did it in pirpose tho. cos its quite obvious tt she got sth in it tt she dun wan us to see. then i know abt the gossip things. din manage to read all entries of cos. then last nite i decided to talk to zx n xl abt it. zx suggest tt i shld just ignore all gossips. she also tell me abit of other things. like yv's blurness almost caused my ignorance. xl told me how she feel when i said sth abt her singing. its hurting. i really din realise. cos i din mean wat they tot i mean. then i apologised to her la. ya.
abt helen. i think she's better then last time la. but sometimes she over sensitive n sometimes super not sensitive. u can see when she is dd sth on purpose. giving hints to the victim. i just hate it when im backstabed. haiz. last time sally also did tt to me. but now she treats me as her real bestfren. not tt she tells me everything. but just there r special bonds btw us. sy also involved. but now she's my dear. girls r troublsome. maybe next time me n helen might become best of frens. bleah.
i basically duno wat every one is thinking. maybe shall be like luxin. dont give a damn to them since they dont know how to appreciate. live in my oen world. but im adraid of loneliness. one side of me wants to know every truth. the other side just tells me i shld hack care abt everything.
ahhh typing in a place freely is cool n shuang!!!! dun need to think abt who the hell will see it.